


now i don't hate california after all

by MelikaElena



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Future Fic, Inspired by Goddess Divine and Sword-Wielding Queen Carly Rae Jepsen, M/M, Minor Adam "Holster" Birkholtz/Justin "Ransom" Oluransi, Minor Chris "Chowder" Chow/Caitlin Farmer, Minor Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann, dex pov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-05-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:53:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24363109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MelikaElena/pseuds/MelikaElena
Summary: Nursey lifted his head and the sheer affection, the sweet tenderness Dex saw in the curled lips, the laugh lines around Nursey’s glowing sea-green eyes, made him catch his breath. That was new, as new as Dex’s own weird, blooming feelings.Maybe he wasn’t alone in this, Dex thought. It wouldn’t surprise him-- after all, they were D-men for life. Partners. They hadn’t always had the smoothest path, but for years now they’d been attuned to each other in all the ways that mattered.Chowder's getting married, but it's his groomsmen who are falling in love.
Relationships: Derek "Nursey" Nurse/William "Dex" Poindexter
Comments: 30
Kudos: 218





	now i don't hate california after all

**Author's Note:**

> For Jenn (jennycaakes), whose birthday was last week and is my writing/fandom partner-in-crime. Surprise! I promise I’ll get back to our project since this impromptu piece is done! And for Em (Embolden), who was my cheerleader for this fic and also beta-read it. Being able to tell you this fic was done was a huge motivating factor for sitting down and writing it every day this weekend. 
> 
> This is the first fic I’ve written & finished in years-- I’ve long despaired that maybe my inspiration and will to write died out with my admittance into Real Adulthood a few years ago but if anything could get me inspired to write, apparently it’s the combined forces of Check, Please! and Carly Rae Jepsen, which seems right. I was listening to the last track of Dedicated Side B and this story just appeared to me. I know it’s not revolutionary in plot or setting, but it’s fun and I’m happy with it. I hope you like it, too.

_i. boy with the getaway_

The only thing Dex hated more than slow drivers, incompetent hockey refs, and 18th century American literature, (what even _was_ “The Last of the Mohicans” and why the fuck did it have to be part of a multi-book series that his junior year professor made them read the entirety of?) was cross-country flights, and don’t even get him _started_ on trying to fold his six-foot-three frame into a middle seat because he was a sucker who stupidly agreed to switch seats so two lovebird honeymooners could sit together. 

For that matter, he also wasn’t sure how he felt about California, either. He had been there a few years before, visiting Chowder one spring break, but felt awkward and out of place among the tanned, beautiful people roaming around. 

But he was back because of Chowder once again: he and Farmer were finally getting married. Besides the fact that he was a groomsman, Dex loved Chowder and would be willing to brave just about anything to support him on his big day, including the dreaded flight, and everything awful that went with it: his skin, which was simultaneously dry and clammy, his rumpled clothes and disheveled hair, the way the recycled air lingered on his skin. There were some people who managed to look glamorous while flying, and Dex certainly wasn’t it.

…The man waving to him, however, certainly did look glamorous and Dex, in all his jetlagged glory, couldn’t even find it in him to be mad about it.

 _Of course_ , Dex thought, moving toward a beaming Derek Nurse, whose dark skin was glowing, bicep casually flexing under his soft v-neck as he curled his garment bag over his shoulder, _of_ course _he still looks like a model after a 6-hour flight. Why would I expect anything different?_

Dex came from Boston where he was working for a tech company; Nursey from New York where he was working at a publishing company, but they arranged it so that their flights would get in around the same time so they could split the cost of a rental car and head over to the hotel together.

“Dexy!” Crooned Nursey, arms opened wide.

Dex sighed loudly, but he stepped into Nursey’s arms willingly, hiding his smile in the crook of Nursey’s neck as he wrapped his arms around him. “Hi, Nurse,” he said gruffly, body relaxing for the first time in hours.

Years at Samwell, surrounded by friends who were affectionate both on and off the ice, had broken down any aversions to casual touch he may have had—honestly, he found that in the couple of years after graduating from college that he was now _pro_ -touch and if he didn’t see his Samwell friends regularly he became kind of touch-starved. 

In fact, Nursey was the one who started it, casually touching Dex long before the others did, and long before they were ever really friends. Nursey was incredibly touchy-feely, and honestly, if it weren’t for the fact that Nursey’s family was in NYC, too, and he knew he saw them often, Dex would be concerned for the other man. (To be honest, he was a little worried, anyway, about Nursey in general: as far as Dex knew, there wasn’t anyone in Nursey’s life who could take care of him properly the way that he and SMH did.) 

“Ow!” Dex flinched as the cold metal hook from the hangar in Nursey’s garment bag rested against the back of his neck. “Watch it, Nursey!”

“Oops!” Nursey said, carefully unwinding himself from Dex. He had learned years before that moving quickly and flailing would only end badly for them both. “Sorry, man. It’s just been too long.” He fluttered his eyelashes a little at Dex, ever the casual flirt. “I missssed you.”

Dex rolled his eyes, his lips quirking in an amused smile. They hadn’t seen each other in a few months, since the birthday of Jack and Bitty’s year-old twins, Penelope and Callum, (or as Shitty called them, Peaches and Cream) but they stayed in touch constantly, mainly through texting and Instagram DMs, although Nursey was known to spring a FaceTime call on him at random times. Dex had learned the hard way to take them immediately if he was able, although he suspected Nursey had a good memory for his schedule, as he rarely called when Dex was unavailable.

Still, it was always good to see him in person. Dex felt something settle within him, like a warm ball in his chest expanding with light.

“Sure you did,” Dex said. “Bet you say that to all the boys.”

Nursey flashed him that heartbreaker grin. “Nah, just you, bro,” he said, slinging his other, bag-less arm around Dex’s neck, propelling him toward the rental car stalls lining baggage claim. If Dex closed his eyes he could imagine them back in the quad at Samwell, leaves crunching beneath their feet as Nursey read aloud from his latest issue of _Poetry Magazine._

But Dex couldn’t close his eyes because he wasn’t the daydreamer of the two of them, and if he closed his eyes Nursey would just trip or propel them into a wall or something. No, he had to keep his eyes open for the both of them.

He snorted but didn’t say anything as the Alamo clerk smiled at them, her grin widening at Nursey’s wink as he asked about their car.

Nursey insisted on making the car reservation since Dex took care of making sure they had hotel reservations, and while Dex trusted him, he couldn’t help but start in surprise when the clerk confirmed that Nursey wanted a luxury rental, which happened to be a red Mustang convertible.

Dex sputtered. “What the hell, Nurse?”

“Before you get your briefs in a twist,” Nurse said, “this rental is for _me_. We’re in southern California, Dex, let me live my _O.C._ dreams.”

Dex raised an eyebrow, trying not to look as Nursey’s long fingers twirled the key ring as they walked to the lot. “So who would this make you? Marissa? Summer?”

Nursey laughed, not even questioning Dex’s astute references. Years of knowing TV expert Adam Birkholtz had given them both a wide berth of pop culture knowledge they otherwise would’ve ignored. “I don’t know, man, but I _do_ know that you would absolutely be Ryan Atwood.”

“Well, there is nothing I like about rich kids,” Dex mused, but he took Nursey’s suitcase from him with a gentle nudge so he knew he didn’t mean him. They’d moved on from that particular pain point ages ago.

Dex glanced over just to be sure, and Nursey didn’t say anything else but he had a little grin on his face, small but real, and it made Dex smile, too. They came to the red Mustang, gleaming in the California sun, and Nursey whistled, popping the trunk as Dex put in their suitcases, carefully folding their respective garment bags, holding their suits, on top.

“Thank god for that west coast time change,” Nursey said. “We’ve got half a day back. What do you say we go grab some lunch before we check in?”

“The Mexican food here is my favorite part of California,” Dex agreed. “Guacamole and a margarita sounds pretty good.”

“Drinking already!” Nursey crowed. “Well, well, well. Watch out world! This weekend only: Dex Gone Wild!”

“It’s Happy Hour somewhere,” Dex countered. He looked at his watch. “At home, even.”

“Act as navigator?” Nursey asked.

Dex was wary of Nursey’s driving—he was a New Yorker through and through who rarely drove—but he was an even worse navigator, so Dex pulled up the detailed itinerary that Farmer sent months ago, which included food recommendations, and plugged in one of her choices into Google Maps.

He had to admit to himself, even if he wouldn’t to Nursey, that the red convertible, top down, was pretty great. The wind in his hair as they sped towards Santa Monica was, frankly, wonderful. And sitting beside Nursey, his curls flying in the wind as he sang along to Phantom Planet, made it absolutely perfect.

* * *

_ii. everything you say is a sweet revelation_

“You guys!” Chowder said, throwing one arm around each of them and squeezing tight. After years of animosity and then tight friendship, Dex and Nursey no longer stood there in begrudging stillness but rather threw their arms around both Chowder and each other so they were a multi-limbed octopus of a hug, a cohesive unit, the Frogs reunited. “I missed you so much!”

Chowder, tanned, beaming, flushed with joy, was worth every minute of that miserable flight, Dex thought fondly. He’d only seen Chowder a few times over the last couple years, most notably at his own bachelor party and before that Ransom and Holster’s wedding, and he was happy that Chowder was happy but he wished, selfishly, that he had stayed on the east coast. But he got a job offer he couldn’t refuse, and his family was all in California, and Dex could understand that.

“We missed you, too, Chow,” Nursey said as they finally separated and entered Chowder’s house. “You missed a helluva birthday party for Peaches and Cream!”

“Tell me all about them!” Chowder wailed in envy, although Jack and Bitty were both coming (sans twins, who were with Bob and Alicia) and would undoubtedly gush about their children. 

Although all of the old Samwell crew was attending, Dex and Nursey would be in California the longest. They were the only two who were groomsmen (Bitty desperately wanted to be a groomsman when Chowder asked, but due to the fact that he lived across the country, and occasionally in an entirely different country, with two children and a rapidly growing baked goods & jam empire, it was an impossible feat, although he was making the wedding cake and accompanying wedding pies. He insisted). Also, they had decided to make it a little mini vacation for them both. The wedding was at a swanky beachside hotel in Santa Monica and although Dex wanted to cry a little bit when he figured out how much it would all cost, he hadn’t had a real vacation since he started working two years prior, and the money he made was good. He wasn’t a struggling college student, his family back in Maine were doing just fine (he tried to help out, but he didn’t get the Poindexter pride from nowhere, after all), and he deserved this. Dex saw a therapist twice a month and they helped him to understand that doing nice, “unnecessary” things for himself didn’t automatically make them frivolous or worthless. 

So he was going to take a goddamn vacation with his best friend while they witnessed their other best friend getting married, and it was going to be awesome, dammit. 

Chowder’s older sister Lisa would be his best (wo)man and had taken care of a lot of the details leading up to the wedding, but Nursey and Dex were involved in some of the planning as well, including the wedding rehearsal dinner, so the three of them chatted about that while they drank wine (and from bottles that cost more than $5-- they were really moving up in the world!) and Chowder grilled steak and vegetables. By the time they were done eating, the sun was setting and the breeze was divine. 

Dex felt his eyes flutter halfway shut in relaxation, leaning back in his chair, listening to Nursey and Chowder argue about whose chances for the Stanley Cup next year were better: the Sharks or the Islanders. (No one cared about the Rangers, and Dex knew better than to bring up the Bruins.) 

“Hey,” Nursey pointed a finger at Chowder, “who fucking _annihilated_ the Pens during last year’s playoffs?” 

Chowder scoffed. “Okay, but are we just _ignoring_ the Sharks incredible comeback against the Aces?” 

“That was sick,” Nursey conceded, “but you really think ol’ Joe has another run left in him?” 

“His beard holds more secrets than your mind can conceive,” Chowder declared. 

“Did you just insinuate that _Joe fucking Thornton_ is the _Regina George of the NHL?”_ Sputtered Nursey, nearly choking on his wine. 

Chowder shrugged, taking a delicate sip of his wine and smirking. 

“I’m shocked that you got Farmer to agree to a version of Sharks colors as your wedding colors, Chow,” Dex said, acting quickly, knowing that this was an argument that would never get resolved. 

“Yeah, there was some negotiating there,” Chowder said cheerfully. “Obviously orange was off the table, and teal is too loud, but light blue and silver worked!” 

“And of course, there’s no shark imagery,” Nursey snickered, although he knew as well as Dex did that Farmer’s wedding present for Chowder to wear at their wedding were tiny silver sharks cufflinks for his suit. _That_ was love. 

Dex had a sudden image of Nursey in a sharp grey suit, with delicate, leaf-shaped cufflinks at his wrists, the bronze color the same ones as the fall leaves at Samwell… 

He froze, blinking in surprise. Where the fuck did _that_ come from? The fact that the image was so clear, so accurate, didn’t startle him that much-- he knew what Nursey liked, after all-- but the aching feeling that accompanied it was what got him. 

Nursey wasn’t seeing anyone, as far as Dex knew, but he was-- had always been-- attractive, both inside and out. Dex knew it was only a matter of time before someone amazing caught Nursey’s eye, caught him _entirely,_ and maybe in a few years Dex would be on a train to New York to watch Nursey get married… 

It would be the best thing for Nursey, Dex knew, not because he was “incomplete” without a partner, but because Nursey _loved_ being in relationships, loved being affectionate and thoughtful, loved to take care of his partners. In relationships where Nursey felt settled and safe, he wasn’t so concerned with acting “chill”; he was relaxed in a way that Dex never saw for the first two years he knew Nursey. (In hindsight Dex realized how anxious and nervous Nursey felt all the time, and of course Dex made that worse before they became real friends.) 

These were all facts that Dex knew about Nursey, although he certainly had never thought about them in the way he was thinking about it now. It was one thing to _know_ but another thing to actively think and analyze them. Furthermore, it was one thing to think and analyze and realize that he should’ve been happy at the thought, happy for that hypothetical, future Nursey and his hypothetical, future life partner. But instead he felt a little sick, a little anxious, in a way he hadn’t in a long time, not since he left for college and felt flares of panic for what he couldn’t control. Dex had never been good with change, but he was better at coping with it, at accepting the inevitability of it all.

But accepting Nursey would one day belong-- wholly and completely-- to someone had him reverting back, had him dry-mouthed and nervous. He didn’t like to think about what that might mean, but he also wasn’t in the habit of lying to himself ever. 

He didn’t want Nursey to be with anyone but him. 

“Dexy?” Nursey stood in front of him, brow furrowed slightly. “You okay, man?” 

“Uh,” Dex cleared his throat. Now wasn’t the time to follow those thoughts further. “Just spaced out. Sorry. Long day.” 

“Oh, man!” Chowder said, scrambling out of his chair. “I totally forgot you guys flew in just this morning! We can talk more, okay? I’ll see you at the hotel tomorrow at 3?” The wedding rehearsal was in the late afternoon, and then the rehearsal dinner. Farmer and Chowder were keeping it simple and short, opting for an early dinner, because by the time it was done all of the Samwell crew would have flown and settled in, and the rest of the night was for drinks in the swanky hotel bar and catching up. 

Normally Dex would be worried-- getting Shitty and Holster drunk in public was always a risk, no matter how much time went on-- but he also knew that Jack rented the penthouse suite as a surprise for both Bitty, and subsequently Chowder, and he planned on herding everyone up for the relative privacy and a lot of room service (although Dex was absolutely going to a Trader Joe’s tomorrow and buying a bunch of stuff. Really. He knew Jack was rich but room service was nearly always a rip-off.) 

“Yeah, see you then,” Nursey said, nudging Dex out of his seat, draping himself all over him, as was his wont, “night, Chow.” 

Dex didn’t want to think more about why his heart was beating faster, why Nursey smelled so good, why his warmth on his back was so comforting. _Would it be like this in bed?_ His inner voice asked. _Nursey cuddled up to your back, face tucked into your neck._

It felt too good to be true, like a dream. Both Nursey and Dex were bi, but Nursey had never acted in any way toward Dex that made him think that he had feelings for him, and Dex, once he got his head out of his ass and really committed to being Nursey’s friend, could always see right through him and his bullshit chill act whenever Nursey whipped it out. So Dex knew, he _knew_ , immediately and without bias, that Nursey wasn’t into him like that. 

Still in a bit of a daze, Dex let Nursey manhandle him into the passenger seat of the car, and Dex wordlessly plugged the hotel directions into his phone and turned it on speaker. 

“You okay, Dex?” Nursey asked softly as they drove. 

“Yeah, Nurse,” he answered in kind. “Just--” he paused, not sure how to phrase it, so he stalled for time, looking out the car. 

The moon was silvery above them, and Dex couldn’t see the water but he knew it was close by. Everything still felt filmy and dreamlike, like the music Nursey was playing on the speakers. 

“I’m sleepy,” he said finally, not a lie. “But I’m-- I feel good.” 

“Yeah?” Nursey said, and Dex turned toward him, their gazes only meeting for a moment before Nursey turned his attention back to the road. 

Dex knew that later, maybe, alone in his room, he would probably begin to panic, to worry about these new feelings, how they didn’t just creep up on him but crashed into him like one of the tidal waves California was famous for, but for right now, he couldn’t find it in him. Right now, he would let him enjoy this feeling of peace for as long as he could. 

* * *

_iii. one more drink, let’s get to the bottom of it_

The next evening, Dex had barely stepped foot into the hotel lobby, tired and full from the rehearsal dinner, when he heard a screech: “There he is! I’d recognize that gleaming red hair anywhere! Our grandson of captain-ship! Get over here, Dexy boy!” The speaker didn’t bother to wait, though, and before he could process what was happening, Dex found himself surrounded, clutched, and lifted into the air. 

“Holster--” he wheezed. “Can’t. Breathe.” 

“Shhhh,” Holster soothed, smoothing a big hand over the back of his head. “Breathing is overrated. My love is all you need.” 

“Holtzy,” came Ransom’s voice, bubbling with laughter. “You know that’s not how that works. Listen to the biology major.” 

“I won’t listen to that guy,” scoffed Holster, but he eased Dex back. “My husband, though? Maybe.” 

Ransom and Holster finally tied the knot last year and even months later Holster still delighted in referring to Ransom as his husband. Dex usually hated PDA in any form, physical or verbal, but it took Ransom and Holster so long to get their shit together he didn’t mind, and besides, they out PDA’d most romantic couples even when their relationship was still strictly (read: mostly) platonic. Dex was used to them. 

“Nursey and Chowder are here, too, you know,” Dex whined, but he was grinning. He’d always looked up to both Ransom and Holster in a way that he never had even with his own older brother, and he secretly basked in having their attention and fond regard on him. They were all in Boston, so luckily Dex saw them often.

“Psh,” Ransom rolled his eyes. “Bitty isn’t letting go of his first born anytime soon, and Shits and Nurse are already in the thick of trading stories about all of the assholes they used to go to high school with.” Shitty, apparently, had just had his 10-year high school reunion and had begrudgingly gone. 

Dex grimaced. “Ugh.” 

“That’s what I said,” Ransom said. “But I guess I’ll have to get used to being around entitled, educated assholes again, eh?” 

Dex blinked. “Are you saying--?” 

“Hell yes!” Holster said, slinging an arm around his husband’s shoulders and pulling him in. “You’re looking at a Harvard-accepted medical student!” 

“Holy shit!” Dex said, going in for a hug. “Rans, that’s incredible. Congratulations!” 

“Thanks, Dex,” Ransom hugged him back. “I’m really nervous-- I’ve been out of school for so long, but I’m ready. It’s time.” 

“And that’s what’s important,” Dex said. “You weren’t ready before and you are now. You’ll be fine.” 

“That’s what I said,” Holster beamed at him in approval. “And you’ll have me. It’ll be just like old times!” 

Ransom grimaced. “With hopefully less panic attacks,” he said. 

“We’ve got to celebrate,” Dex said. 

“Absolutely,” Ransom said, then, raising his voice, “not this weekend, though, because this weekend, it’s about Chowder, who’s _getting married!”_

The Samwell crew who had congregated-- Jack, Bitty, Shitty, Lardo, Ollie, Wicky, Whiskey, Tango, Foxtrot, and Nursey-- whooped loudly at Ransom’s pronouncement. Chowder and Farmer blushed but raised their clasped hands good-naturedly. 

“Shots?” Holster yelled. 

Shitty was already nodding when Dex caught Jack’s eye, the latter of whom gave a nod. They had this down to a science. 

“If you can wait a couple more minutes for the shots,” Jack said, not too loudly but everyone quieted, anyway. Once their captain, always their captain. “We can take this party to Haus 3.0?” 

Haus 3.0 wasn’t a singular place, but rather a revolving mixture of hotel rooms and Air BnBs, meant to indicate not a place but an occasion, a gathering of SMH alumni. As Shitty usually said at these events, drunk off his ass with tears in his eyes, home wasn’t a place but a people. 

“Jack Zimmerman, big of ass, wallet, and heart,” Shitty crooned. “Did you get the penthouse for lil’ ol’ us?” 

Jack sighed. “It was either that or get banned from another hotel bar.” 

“Come on, y’all,” Bitty said cheerfully. “If you manage to get yourselves up there without knocking over anything or anyone, you can have a slice of pre-wedding pie!” 

Dex would ask where Bitty got access to a kitchen but he knew by now that Jack and Bitty never stayed in any suite without a full kitchen. Ah, the blessings of an NHL salary. 

Dex took his time strolling to the elevator banks, not wanting to get caught up in the stampede for pie, and because he wasn’t following them up immediately, anyway. He wanted to go change, and plus, Jack and Bitty might’ve taken care of getting the booze, but Dex volunteered to get the mixers and garnishes for the variety of cocktails that Bitty would whip out (Tub Juice had been banned from hotel rooms after the New Years Eve Incident of 2018.) 

“Need help, Poindexter?” 

Dex turned, seeing Nursey slouch towards him, looking too handsome in his pale green button-up and immaculately pressed charcoal slacks. He had been trying not to stare at him all night. 

“Sure,” he said, “although there isn’t much to carry. I’m probably going to change, too.” 

Nursey looked disappointed for a minute. “You sure?” He said. “You look good tonight.” 

Dex blinked, looking down out of habit, even though he knew full well what he was wearing-- a light blue button-up and black dress pants. (Nursey had convinced him to forgo a tie, stating, “It’s California, bro, they’re chill here about that kind of thing.”) 

Dex could feel himself blushing. “Thanks,” he said, willing himself to sound calm. “But, uh, I don’t want to spill something on it and stain it.” 

Nursey sighed. “I guess I should change, too, then,” he said, “since I’ll probably be the one doing the spilling.” 

Nursey tended to get even more handsy when drunk-- how could Dex forget? He felt a flash of fear of doing something stupid while drinking. 

Oh, well-- he shouldn’t be drinking too much tonight, anyway. None of them should, although he knew it wouldn’t stop them. A reunion with all of them together was rare these days, and they were all determined to make the most of it. 

Nursey and Dex changed into more casual clothes and arrived at the penthouse with the mixers to cheers. Shitty, predictably, was already shirtless, hanging off of Jack’s shoulders, and Lardo somehow had paint on her face. Ransom and Holster had Farmer and Chowder on their shoulders and Ollie and Wicky were yelling at them not to run into the chandelier hanging from the ceiling. Whiskey, Tango, and Foxtrot were trying to film a TikTok of the entire scene. 

_Haus sweet haus_ , Dex thought fondly. He hoped the hotel damages wouldn’t be too bad this time; keeping a Fine Jar was really hard when everyone lived apart. 

“Someone better have saved us pie!” Nursey announced. 

Bitty, angel that he was, had hidden them some slices, of course. 

The rest of the night passed in a joyous blur that ended with Chowder and Farmer Uber’ing home, with Shitty, Jack, and Lardo passed out on the couch. Ollie, Wicky, Ransom, and Holster stumbled down to their rooms, and Dex found himself helping Bitty tidy the kitchen a little with a drunk Nursey hanging off of him. 

“Dexxxyyyy,” Nursey slurred. “I’m tired, can we go to bed now?” 

Dex sighed, and turned, putting his hands on Nursey’s shoulders and propelling him to sit in a chair. “I’m almost done,” he said, “and then we can go. The sooner you let me clean, the sooner you can go to sleep.” Suggesting Nursey leave without him was a futile effort. 

When he turned around, Bitty had his eyebrows raised, a teasing smile on his lips. “I didn’t know you two were sharing a room,” he said. 

“We’re not,” Dex said, “although we did get adjoining rooms.” In the inevitable event that Nursey lost his room card, he could just get in through Dex’s room. 

“Hmm,” Bitty said. 

Dex lowered his voice. “It’s not like that, Bits,” he said. “It never has been.” 

“I believe you,” Bitty said sweetly, but then he leaned close to Dex. “Although I also recognize pining when I see it.” 

Dex sighed. “ _I_ just figured it out,” Dex whined. “Is it already so obvious?” 

“Dex,” Bitty said mock-sternly, “Chowder might be my son, but you’re my baking protege. I know you better than you think.” 

“Fine,” Dex said. “As long as _he_ doesn’t know.” 

“Would that be so bad?” Bitty asked. 

“I--” Dex stopped. Thought about it. “I don’t know,” he admitted. 

“I’m not saying you should tell him now, or even that you should at all,” Bitty said, “Lord knows I’d be a hypocrite if I did. But don’t just brush it off as an impossibility either.” 

“Thanks, Bits,” Dex said quietly, as he handed him the last dish to put in the washer and then went to go collect Nursey. 

Nursey Patrol had certainly gotten easier over the years, thank god, especially since Nursey stopped wandering off and for the most part was content to cuddle his friends at any opportunity. Dex minded that less and less over the years although now his low-grade anxiety was back. It was almost tortuous because it was becoming easier and easier to imagine them together, stumbling back from a SMH gathering together, but instead of Dex depositing Nursey in bed and leaving, he could just crawl in next to him… 

“One thing at a time, Poindexter,” he muttered to himself. 

“Wazzit, Dexy?” Nursey said. 

“Don’t worry about it, Nurse,” Dex sighed as he pulled the covers up over him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” 

Shutting the door softly behind him, Dex surveyed his room. He had been really excited about the California King just the other day. It looked pretty lonely now, though. 

* * *

_iv. both our hands speak for us and complicate it_

Derek Nurse, Dex thought to himself, was nothing but trouble. He’d known it from the moment when they met on their Taddy Tour, his green eyes bright and interested despite the bored smirk of his pretty-boy mouth. When they were paired together on the ice and it was like magic. When Nursey slung his arm over his shoulder and put his mouth close to Dex’s ear, reciting poetry like a spell. When Dex, snug in a newly-created basement bungalow, couldn’t get the image of Nursey’s hurt face out of his mind. When Nursey hugged him so tightly when they graduated and said, voice tight, that he would miss Dex. When Dex saw him every time after and felt something in his chest loosen and settle. When he waved at him across a crowded airport not 48 hours before and Dex fell in love. 

And now there was the damned groomsman suit, a light blue that should’ve been tacky but instead, with the softer, looser material, fit the southern California beach wedding better than a formal, heavy tux would. 

The suits had been tailored, Dex knew, so of course the fit would be good, but this was just excessive, bordering on _obscene_. Nursey looked like a movie star, all gleaming white teeth, soft hair, broad shoulders, and long, long legs. 

Dex forcibly turned his head away from where Nursey stood in the doorway of where their rooms met. 

“Dex,” Nursey said in surprise and glee. “Are you not ready yet?” 

Dex sighed. For all that he didn’t drink that much the night before, he woke up later than intended, and had just finished shaving. He was mostly dressed, at least. He just needed to put his shirt and jacket on. Chowder, like Nursey, had an aversion to ties. 

“Aww, the ginger scruff is gone,” Nursey pouted, and then he stepped into the bathroom so he was framed in the mirror with Dex. “Bummer. I liked it.” 

Dex blinked. “You did?” He’d gotten lazy the last couple days, slipping into vacation mode much easier than he thought, and that included foregoing shaving. 

Nursey commenting on Dex’s appearance wasn’t anything new-- he loved to comment on Dex’s red hair and his freckles, but this was different. Coupled with how good he thought Dex looked last night, it was almost as though… 

“Yeah, it’s a good look,” Nursey said lightly. “So what’s the hold up?” 

Dex shook himself, trying not to stare too obviously at Nursey’s reflection in the mirror. God _dammit_. “My hair,” he said. “It’s long now.” He had meant to get it cut, but since it was the first vacation he’d taken since he started working for his company, he wanted to make sure that everything was in order before he left, which meant early mornings, late nights, and no time for a hair cut. And now his hair was a little longer with a slight curl to it, making it harder to tame. 

“This is why I get it cut every month,” he grumbled. “I hate worrying over it.” 

“It looks good longer,” Nursey said, his eyes running over it. “You got mousse?” 

“Yeah,” Dex sighed, digging it out of his toiletries bag. He went out to the store the night before his flight and grabbed some, knowing it would come to this. 

“Then let me handle it,” Nursey said, swiping it before Dex could protest. He got some on his fingers and rubbed his hands together and Dex tried not to flush. 

“I don’t--” he protested. 

“It’s ok, I got you, Will,” Nursey said, casually shutting Dex down. First names always meant serious business, and the message was clear: Nursey would take care of him. Not to mention the intimacy of it startled Dex into compliance every time. He hoped Nursey never noticed that. 

“Thanks, Derek,” Dex said quietly, trying not to moan at the feel of Nursey’s long fingers combing through his hair, coaxing Dex’s hair to do what he wanted. 

They were both quiet for a moment before Nursey was finished. When he stepped aside to show the finished product, Dex blinked in surprise. He looked… _good_. His hair looked tidy but also slightly windswept at the same time, both artfully arranged without seeming like he tried too hard. And having it a little longer rather than shorn close to his head meant it added proportion to his ears. 

“Like it?” Nursey grinned, resting his chin on Dex’s shoulder. 

“...You’ve got to show me how you did that,” Dex said faintly.

“Sure,” Nursey agreed easily, stepping away. “Those bridesmaids better watch out! They won’t know what hit them.” 

Dex snorted before he could help himself. First off, no one would be looking twice at him with Nursey there. Secondly, _he_ wouldn’t look at anyone twice with Nursey there. “Uh-huh,” he said, grabbing his shirt off the hanger and buttoning it up over his undershirt. 

“I’m not kidding, Dex,” Nursey said, a little seriously. “You’ve got to stop believing the god-awful lie that you’re not hot like burning.” 

Dex laughed at Nursey’s phrasing even though his heart began to beat wildly. _What was happening?_ “It’s not that, Nurse, really,” Dex assured him. “It’s just-- I don’t want any bridesmaids.” 

Nursey stilled where he was checking his own hair in the full-length mirror by the door. “No?” He asked. 

Dex met Nursey’s eyes in the mirror, willing himself not to blush. “No,” he said lowly. 

They both stood silently, eyes still locked, until both their phones vibrated at the same time. 

“Chow,” they said simultaneously, reaching for their phones. 

Whatever weird moment they’d just had, they’d have to sort it out later. Right now, they had a wedding to get to. 

* * *

_v. i’ve been waiting for your star to shine so bright_

Dex may not have let himself go full-throttle the night before but he was letting go now. How could he not? The wedding had been beautiful-- Chowder and Farmer had timed the ceremony perfectly so that it happened during golden hour and their faces were bathed with a radiant glow, both from the sun and their love for each other. 

Their vows were simple and heartfelt, and even made Dex tear up. Nursey, Bitty, and Shitty were lost causes from the get-go, the latter of whom sobbed pretty loudly (“Marriage is an archaic institution dreamed up by the puritanical patriarchy,” Shitty would say at every wedding, blowing his nose, “but god _dammit_ if showing love doesn’t get me every time.”) 

The food was good, the atmosphere light-hearted and the company-- all of SMH clustered together over two tables-- was perfect. Now they were well into the dancing and drinking portion of the evening, and it was at that perfect stage where some of the older attendees were starting to filter out, and the younger crowd was just getting going. According to Chowder, they had the venue for another hour, and from there they were either going to steal some champagne and wine to-go and spill out onto the beach or head back to Jack and Bitty’s penthouse. 

For now, Ransom managed to corral the DJ into taking a break and eating some cake so he could get his greedy paws on the AUX cord and hook up his phone.

“Justin Oluransi!” Screeched Holster. “You didn’t tell me you were going to commandeer this event! We didn’t even go over a playlist!” 

“It’s the Classic Haus Party Mix, Holtz,” Ransom screamed back. “Just trust me, babe.” 

Dex always trusted Ransom over Holster when it came to music. If it was Holster, you never knew what musical showtune would find its way into the mix. Not that showtunes were bad, he just _really_ didn’t need to hear Lin Manuel Miranda rapping when he was trying to pick-up. Especially when his date usually wanted to sing along rather than make out. 

“Shot-line!” Shitty yelled. “Get your asses over here, we’re doing them by class!” 

Chowder was too busy being a good host, so Dex and Nursey were the ones holding it down for Class of 2018, waiting for Jack and Shitty to go first, then Lardo, Ransom, and Holster, then Bitty, Ollie, and Wicky, before passing the metaphorical torch to Whiskey, Tango, and Foxtrot. 

“Love a good Dynasty Shot Line,” Shitty hiccuped. “Generations of SMH together, taking shots, as God ‘n’ Gritty intended.” 

Bitty grinned. “You just made that up,” he teased. “There’s no such thing as a Dynasty Shot Line.” 

“Ok, fine, but so what! I love legacies, bro!” Shitty said, jumping on him and messing up his hair. “In a non-pretentious douchebag way.” 

“Whatever you say, Barnesandnoble,” Lardo said fondly, who in recent years after learning Shitty’s real name decided to call him by other pretentious, fake B-names, like “Bentley” and “Birkenstock.” 

Nursey didn’t move away from Dex after he took his shot, instead wrapping his arms around Dex’s waist. “Dexxxxxx,” he whined in his ear. “You’ve danced with everyone tonight but me.” 

Dex looked at him, amused, as Nursey led him back onto the dance floor, everyone else following as an old favorite song came on. “ _You_ danced with everyone tonight but me,” he said playfully, spinning a laughing Nursey, nearly giggling himself. Man were shots _good._ Alcohol was _great_. “Maybe _you’re_ the one who’s looking to hook up with a bridesmaid, hmm?” 

Nursey blinked at him, surprised, stumbling into Dex and pushing his face into Dex’s shoulder as the music slowed. Dex vaguely heard Ollie and Wicky yelling out _FUCK YEAH_ , _SLOW BONE MUSIC_. Jesus Christ, they were the most unromantic married couple he ever knew. And he _remembered_ Shitty and Lardo’s commitment ceremony. 

Nursey shook his head vehemently on Dex’s shoulder so he felt it. “No,” he said resolutely, wrapping his arms around Dex’s waist. “No way. Only want you.” 

Dex paused, his hands fluttering over Nursey’s back. “What?” He said, and he hoped he didn’t say that too loudly. He could barely hear the music over the ringing in his ears. “ _Me?”_

Nursey lifted his head and the sheer affection, the sweet tenderness Dex saw in the curled lips, the laugh lines around Nursey’s glowing sea-green eyes, made him catch his breath. _That_ was new, as new as Dex’s own weird, blooming feelings. 

Maybe he wasn’t alone in this, Dex thought. It wouldn’t surprise him-- after all, they were D-men for life. Partners. They hadn’t always had the smoothest path, but for years now they’d been attuned to each other in all the ways that mattered. 

“You,” Nursey said softly. “You, Will.” 

“Derek,” Dex said slowly, his head so fuzzy, his heart racing, “I--” 

“SAMWELL MEN’S HOCKEY TEAM AND KICK-ASS MANAGERS,” Shitty stood on a table, and Jack was trying to corral him down before the wait staff kicked them out, and Shitty gleefully climbed onto Jack’s back, mission accomplished, the beautiful, manipulative bastard, “IT IS TIME TO HEAD OUT. GRAB WHAT YOU NEED AND LET’S GO INTO THE NIGHT, MY BRILLIANT STARS.” 

Nursey and Dex looked at each other as chaos reigned. “I get the bottle, you get the glasses?” Dex said. 

Nursey just looked at him, startled, a little lost. 

Dex might not have been firing on all cylinders, but he decided to follow his instincts here, anyway. He touched Nursey’s hand briefly. “We’ll talk,” he said, trying to reassure him that his confession-- if that’s what it was, and Dex couldn’t quite believe it-- wasn’t being ignored. “Promise. But we gotta go before Shitty gets us kicked out.” 

It was the right move; Nursey smiled. “Okay,” he said, appeased. “I’ll get two more glasses for Chowder and Farmer, too. Just in case.” 

“Good thinking,” Dex said. “Meet you outside in five?” 

Nursey nodded. “I’ll see you there.” 

Luckily, Dex had worked catering gigs before and knew that the crew were under instructions to start locking up the booze right before they did last call, so he had sneakily taken a bottle of champagne right after they cut the cake, and stashed it underneath their table. It was in a bucket, too, but it still probably wouldn’t be the coldest. Oh, well. It’s not like any of them were sober enough to care. 

He crawled back from under the table, champagne bottle hidden under his suit jacket, cradled under his arm, with his cell phone in his other hand, so to anyone cleaning up it would look like he had dropped it under the table and that was what he was retrieving rather than a stolen champagne bottle. 

It worked like a charm. Dex paused, draining an abandoned glass of water, then another, trying to keep hydrated, and soon he was outside and on the steps of the beach. Chowder and Farmer opted to use recyclable champagne glasses instead of glassware from the hotel. Tackier, maybe, but the end game was this, right here: drinking on the beach with their friends. 

“To the bride and groom!” Bitty cheered, and they all huzzahed to the radiant bride and groom. 

“Thanks, you guys,” Chowder said, flushed and beaming. “This day wouldn’t have been the same without you all!” 

Bottles were popped and champagne was flowing as they fluttered off into the night. SMH was prepared to party, as always, and Farmer’s dress had a detachable skirt that she’d ditched long before, so she was able to move freely. Ransom produced portable speakers from God-knew-where, and Lardo and Foxtrot already had their heels off and dangling from their fingertips. 

Ollie and Wicky were on the hunt for the “perfect spot” to hunker down in, and soon they found an abandoned fire pit, where Ransom cranked the music and everyone continued to dance and drink for another few hours. 

Dex couldn’t help but feel a little frustrated that he and Nursey weren’t able to have a moment alone, but maybe that was a good thing, because he was starting to get a little nervous. What if he had misinterpreted what Nursey meant back at the venue? What if he only wanted a hook up, and, oh god, they were supposed to be _on vacation together, just the two of them,_ for the next few days? 

It was as though he knew that Dex was freaking out, because within a few minutes, Nursey was sauntering up to Dex and asking, hands in his pockets, the picture of Chill, “Hey, wanna go walk around?” 

Dex glanced at the party. It did look to be winding down, Chowder and Farmer having left an hour ago. “Sure,” he said. 

They bid everyone farewell, and Dex caught Bitty’s eye. The blond man, with Jack’s head in his lap as he lounged by the bonfire, gave him an encouraging smile and wave. They would see everyone tomorrow morning for brunch before their flights left throughout the day, so Dex didn’t feel the need to draw out their goodbyes. 

He and Nursey walked along the beach, skirting other parties, trying not to get too close to the water, although it was tempting to wade in, dress shoes and all. 

Dex didn’t know what to say, how to start, so he waited for Nursey. Maybe that was cowardly, but he just didn’t want to fuck anything up here, and he knews that, even if it was a long time ago, his own assumptions about Nursey were what held them back to being friends initially. 

“I meant what I said,” Nursey said finally, and his words caused them both to stop walking. “Earlier. About-- about not wanting anyone else but you.” 

Dex swallowed. “Yeah? And how… how do you want me?” It felt both safer and scarier to be saying this without looking at each other, to only have the dark horizon to look at. “For just tonight? For this trip? For--” 

“For as long as you want me,” Nursey interrupted him, his words said forcefully on an exhale. “Maybe that sounds crazy, but I wouldn’t have said anything if I just wanted a hook-up. I wouldn’t do that to you, wouldn’t risk our friendship for that.” 

That was reassuring, and Dex felt a lot of the tension leave him. It meant something, to know that Nursey, King of Chill, was treating this seriously. Treating _them_ seriously. 

“How long?” Dex wanted to know. “Have you felt this way?” 

Nursey sighed. “A while,” he said. “I don’t know. I think it’d been building for a long time, and then when we were planning this trip... I remember talking about it to my friends and my family and they all basically said the same thing: How happy they were for us. How I’d been mooning over you for ages and that they were glad that we finally got our shit together. How we seemed like a good match. And I realized that, okay, we weren’t together, but in essence they weren’t _wrong._ I looked at how we were and I liked what I saw. I realized I liked _you._ So much. And I was going to use this trip to see if maybe you felt the same.” Nursey looked over at Dex, and Dex, seeing the movement in his peripheral vision, looked back. “Do you?” 

Dex exhaled. “Yeah,” he said. And for once, between them, it was simple. Easy. “I feel it, too. I didn’t realize it until I got here, until I thought that maybe it would be you in a couple years, getting married, and I realized that I just _hated_ that thought when I know I should be happy for you. It didn’t take me long to figure out why I felt that way.” 

Nursey shook his head, but he was smiling, grin bright under the moonlight. “You’re a champion worrier, Poindexter,” he teased, but he moved closer. “But let me tell you, with, like, total sincerity--”

“Oh my god,” Dex said. “Don’t you _dare--_ ”

“-- _Chill.”_

“I hate you,” Dex muttered, but he swayed closer to Nursey until their mouths met, and they both went into the kiss smiling. 

* * *

_vi. take me to the feeling_

“Dexxxx.” 

“No.” 

A low laugh. “Come on, babe, you _promised_.” 

Grumbling, Dex lifted his head from his extremely comfortable pillow to see Nursey, looking bright-eyed as he innocently blinked up at him from his spot on the bed. “I did, but I didn’t say what time.” 

“Everyone knows you have to get to the beach early to stake out the best spot!” Nursey said. “Plus, we basically spent all day in bed yesterday,” and here he waggled his eyebrows. “We only left once to go get brunch with everyone.” 

After divulging their feelings for each other, they stumbled back to their hotel rooms, and Nursey followed Dex to bed. “Is this okay?” He’d asked as Dex climbed into bed. Nursey stood in front of the bed, looking nervous. “We don’t have to do anything tonight--” 

“Good,” Dex said. “I’m beat.” And when he and Nursey had sex he wanted it to be good. But he turned back the comforter on the other side of the bed. “But I’d be good with cuddling?” 

Nursey beamed at him, scrambling to get in, curling up around Dex’s back like he’d always been there. 

They slept in, but got up early enough to fool around a little bit before they had to get ready. Nursey kept distracting Dex, coming in to his room to tease him, kiss him, cajole him into not shaving but letting Nursey do his hair again. 

And when they came downstairs to breakfast, hand-in-hand, the entire table cheered. 

“Oh my god,” Shitty yelled reverently, “it’s actually happening!” 

“You owe me $20,” Foxtrot told Lardo. 

“GAAYYYYYYYY,” Ollie and Wicky screamed at them. 

“Y’all,” Bitty said, “can we _please_ not get banned from this hotel? They have a make-your-own mimosa bar. I’d like to be able to come back.” But he grinned at Dex and Nursey in delight, and Dex knew for a fact that Bitty probably baked a few dozen mini-pies for the hotel staff. That always helped. 

“Congrats, you two,” Jack said, beaming at them like a proud parent. 

“You guys,” Chowder said, throwing his arms around Dex and Nursey, which quickly devolved into a Frogs Hug, “this is the _best_ wedding present you could’ve given me!” 

“Aww, Chow,” Nursey teased, “does this mean I can take back the KitchenAid stand mixer?” 

“And what are _you_ gonna do with it, Nurse?” Dex rolled his eyes. “You can’t bake.” 

“Chyeah,” Nursey agreed, “but my boyfriend does. And I’m _hoping_ he’ll come bake for me when he comes to visit.” 

Dex sobered for a moment, although Nursey’s casual use of “boyfriend” thrilled him. He’d nearly forgotten that he and Nursey lived nearly four hours apart. It wasn’t a huge amount-- the route between NYC and Boston was well-travelled and you could easily get a bus ticket there for $20 or less-- but still, it would be a long-distance relationship. 

Shitty cleared his throat pointedly, jolting Dex out of his thoughts, wanting a hug from them both, too. 

Everyone was in high spirits, despite some lingering hangovers, and soon it was time for people to be heading to the airport. 

“Harvard celebration soon?” Dex asked Ransom as he hugged him goodbye.

“You know it,” Ransom said. “Holster’s probably got the whole thing planned already. Jack and Bitty already said they’d find a sitter for the night to come up. Maybe you can get your boyfriend to come, too?” 

Dex ducked his head. “Yeah, I can probably do that.” 

“Happy for you, bro,” Ransom said. 

Holster bounded up and boomed, “Another generation of Samwell D-Men being super gay for each other. I’m so proud!” 

“Thanks, Holtz,” Dex laughed. “Huh. Yeah, we really have a pattern, don’t we?” 

“What can we say, we love the D!” Holster cackled. 

“Oh, my god, Holtzy, that was so bad,” Nursey declared, swooping in to give Dex a peck on the cheek. 

“FINE!” Everyone screamed. 

Jack held out his hand. “It’s tips for the staff,” he said as Nursey dug out his wallet. ‘They deserve it after this display.” 

Dex was already sad to have everyone go, but he’d see them soon enough, and to be honest he doubted he’d miss them terribly, especially for the rest of this week, where he’d be entertaining his impatient boyfriend. 

“I know I wore you out yesterday,” Nursey said with another eyebrow waggle, “but I promise I’ll let you nap and reapply your sunscreen every two hours.” 

“Better make it every hour,” Dex sighed. “You know I burn easily.” 

“My east coast lobster,” Nursey declared, giving Dex another kiss. “I’ll save you from the sun, baby!” 

Dex grinned, because this is what he had dreamed of, Nursey, affectionate and giving. Dex would do his best to make sure Nursey knew he was appreciated. He would take care of him, too. 

“All right,” he said. He went to the mini fridge/freezer in the room and pulled out an insulated lunch box, their reusable water bottles (filled), some fruit and sandwiches, and some small ice packs. 

“When did you get all that?” Nursey said, eyes wide. 

“When we went to Trader Joes for the mixers,” Dex said. “The lunch bag and water bottles are from home, obviously, but I figured you’d get hungry on the beach, so I bought snacks and stuff for us for the week.” 

“Oh, my god, I love you,” Nursey said, making grabby hands at Dex before he paused, eyes widening in fear. 

“Hey,” Dex said, depositing the filled lunch bag on the bed as he slid into Nursey’s arms. “ _Chill_.” 

Nursey sputtered at him, but before he could shut down completely, Dex ducked in and kissed him. “Derek. I love you, too.” 

Nursey melted. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” he said, smiling. “You think I’d pack lunch for just anybody? Now let’s go to the beach.” 

As revenge for trying to usurp his Chill Throne, Nursey played the “Starships” Vine over and over until Dex was ready to go. 

Paying an exorbitant amount of money to stay at the hotel was worth it, Dex thought, since it was steps away from the beach. They were easily able to find a spot Nursey seemed worthy, and the hotel had a section just for guests which included an umbrella and lounge chairs. True to his word, Nursey took great delight in massaging sunscreen into Dex’s skin, and it felt so good that if he wasn’t so relaxed he would’ve dragged Nursey back to their rooms. 

Nevertheless, they both had fun splashing around in the water, and even were corralled into partaking in a beach volleyball game. 

Feeling relaxed and exhausted in a way he only felt after being outside all day, Nursey and Dex climbed into the huge hotel shower and washed off. “How do you feel about leaving the hotel and going somewhere for dinner?” Nursey murmured, washing Dex’s hair for him. He was going to become spoiled with this sort of treatment, Dex just knew it. “Have our first date?” 

As tempting as it was to stay inside, Dex knew that Nursey was excited about this. “Sure,” he said. “We gotta make use of your fancy car, after all.” 

Nursey laughed. “Admit it, you love that car,” he said. “You _like_ California.” 

“Eh,” Dex shrugged. “California’s fine, I guess. I like California with _you_ , though.” He climbed out of the shower, leaving Nursey sputtering.

“Poindexter!” He exclaimed in shock. “Have you always been this smooth?” 

Feeling a little daring, drunk off of sunshine and the sea, Dex looked over his shoulder to wink at Nursey as he toweled off. 

“Oh my god, fuck me,” Nursey murmured. 

“Later, if you ask nicely,” Dex said with a laugh. 

“WILL!” 

Dinner was at a nice, family-owned seafood restaurant that had amazing views of the water, and Dex couldn’t help but tease, as they walked back to the car, “A good first date?” 

“It was so good I’ll even go home with you,” Nursey joked, but then he fell quiet. 

Dex frowned, nudging him. “Hey, what’s up?” 

“I haven’t really told anyone except Shits, but, uhh, I’ve been applying to MFA programs this past year.” 

Dex swallowed. “Yeah?” That explained Shitty’s look at breakfast, but Dex couldn’t tell if it was good or bad. “That’s awesome, Nursey. I remember you saying back at Samwell that you’d wanted to do it.” 

“Yeah, it was time. I mean, working in publishing has been good in some ways,” Nursey said, running his hand through his hair as they climbed in the car, but he made no move to start it. “I mean, work experience is good. Having connections in the industry is good. But it’s not exactly what I want to be doing. And working to get from an editorial assistant to being able to actually acquire and edit things takes so long, and I don’t know if it’s worth it for me.” 

“So..?” 

“So I applied to some places. Five, to be exact. And I got into two of them.” He bit his lip. “NYU and Boston University.” 

Dex blinked. “That’s-- that’s great.” He looked over at Nursey. “Right?” 

“I think so,” Nursey said. “I’d be happy going to either place. But with you and I-- I wanted-- I didn’t know--” 

“Nursey,” Dex said firmly, turning to face him. He pulled Nursey’s hands so he could clasp them both. “Derek. I’d be so happy if you decided to move back Boston. But if you decided to go to NYU and stay in New York? That decision’s not a game changer for me. We’d figure out long distance. It’s what I was already planning in my head, anyway.”

Nursey smiled, shyly. “Yeah?” He said. “Plans?” 

“Already looked up bus tickets and train fare and everything,” Dex admitted. “It’s so doable. So choose what feels right, okay?” 

Nursey nodded. “Okay,” he said. “And if what feels right is because it’s close to you…?” 

“It’s your decision,” Dex said. “And how you make that decision is yours alone. I won’t judge for how much or little I factor into it. But if you need questions answered from me so you can make that choice with all of the info you need… I’m happy to provide them.” 

Nursey shook his head. “God, Will,” he said, “how are you real?” 

Dex shrugged. “Therapy and the wisdom of life experiences?” He joked. 

But Nursey wouldn’t let him off the hook. “I’m glad it’s you,” he said. “I’m glad it’s now. I know what the others have said. That we were inevitable. That it was about time. Maybe that’s true, but I’m glad it happened how it did. I don’t think we were ready any sooner.” 

“Me either,” Dex agreed and leaned in to kiss him. “If anyone can figure this out, it’s us.” 

“Got your back,” Nursey said softly. 

“Always,” Dex affirmed. “Now. Dessert?” 

Nursey gave him a lascivious grin. “Room service?” He said, turning on the car and backing out of the lot. “I know you call it a waste of money, but I _believe_ I was promised something earlier, and I want to collect. I don’t want to wait another minute.” 

Dex laughed. It was hard not to be in a good mood, not to feel lucky, not to appreciate everything he had and everything he’d worked for. Cruising along Pac Highway with his boyfriend next to him in a sleek car, wind through his hair… he couldn’t ask for anything more. “You win,” Dex agreed. “No more waiting. Let’s go home.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Lyrics from the following Carly Rae Jepsen songs:
> 
> Title: “Now I Don’t Hate California After All”  
> i. “Automatically in Love”  
> ii. “I Really Like You”  
> iii. “Let’s Sort The Whole Thing Out”  
> iv. “Felt This Way” / “Stay Away”  
> v. “This Love Isn’t Crazy”  
> vi. “Run Away with Me”


End file.
